Growing up is weird.
It’s weird that I’m 19 going on 20, it’s weird that I have my own credit card, drivers license, voting registration number and can even drink in most countries. It’s weird that I live essentially unsupervised in the middle of a major city across an entire ocean from all I’ve known for the past 19 years. And it’s weird that my parents were ok with the crazy idea of this. It’s weird that I can do what I want when I want because my free time no longer revolves around the arbitrary duties of being a high school kid who lives under someone else’s roof. It’s weird to live under my own roof and even weirder to think about the fact that I have my own roof.
At the end of my senior year of high school, I was very sad and nostalgic about leaving. I wasn’t so much sad about leaving my friends and teachers behind as much as I was about not having any high school cult classic movies and TV shows apply to me anymore. It’s true. The high school years are so glorified and iconic. Wild football games, prom, crazy house parties, hearing whispers of gossip scatter the halls, lunch table banter, stupid petty drama, your first car, your first love, and maybe even some school. Yeah, sometimes it can be awkward and messy and uncomfortable and unpleasant and other not so fun adjectives. But through all of the peculiar encounters and memories you made that you may or may not actually remember, it was a time of learning how to be you.
Now having almost completed my first year of college in a most unconventional way I look back at how my life was a year before when I was just about to fly from the comforting nest of my high school days and soar into the unknown. I think about how important those days were for me to know exactly what I wanted to manifest for my post-high school life. And to see now how I turned those dreams into reality which wouldn’t have been possible without those 4 pivotal years in which I learned how to be me. Now watching my little brother, in the hight of his glamorous cult-classic-esque time among the slamming lockers, I want to offer some words (from) the wise. Here is my very dense and random letter to my brother Max and anyone else who needs to hear it:
Max,
Don’t grow up too fast because growing up is weird. All of a sudden you find yourself alone in a big world
where you have to learn how dishwashers work and how to use an ATM. There are upsides to it too but don’t let the future distract you from the present. You can always grow up but you cant ever again be as young as you are right now. Don’t do everything your friends do because it’s more than likely that your friends will do some pretty unwise things. And on that note, don’t do said unwise things to impress your friends, or a girl, or anyone. We’d like you to come out of your teenage years with all your limbs intact if possible. Trust your gut. Whatever feels right, do it and whatever feels wrong, don’t. Don’t spread shit, you’re not a monkey. Don’t be the subject of unnecessary petty drama and don’t spread it when it comes across your path. There are much more interesting and mind-expanding topics to discuss. Don’t be afraid to have an intelligent conversation. The universe is so much more beautiful and grand than the trivial yet seemingly paramount drama of high school. Don’t look at your phone every 20 seconds. Look around you, observe, think about things with your brain. It does no good for the mind to be put on autopilot every time a dull moment arises. Turn that moment into something interesting and creative. The world on the other side of the screen can wait. Be kind to people. Like genuinely kind. The asshole attitude doesn’t look good on anybody, especially you. Respect women and girls. They’re not objects for you to gawk at with your friends. Talk to them like they are people and treat them as equals. F*ckboys come and go but nice guys are always the one’s girls love at the end of the day. Floss every day. Seriously, floss. And take a shower while you’re at it. It’s ok to cry and to be emotional and to have feelings. You’re a human, not a robot. Take care of your body. Eat vegetables and fruits, drink lots of water, move your body, get in the sunshine and practice self-love and care. Work hard in school. Study, pay attention, learn something new and learn more about what interests you even outside of school. Read. Read, read, read. Be nice to your parents. Like seriously they have given you the WORLD. Nothing is for sure and nothing is forever. Stay present in every moment and always be thankful for what you have. You won the lottery on life dude, make the most of it by spreading goodness and love every chance you get. Like Ferris Bueller said: “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” Remember, growing up is weird. But revel in the weirdness. Take every moment as a lesson and never compromise yourself for anyone. After all, you won’t know the true impact of these years until you find yourself in a foreign country where everyone is confused why your parents were arrogant enough to name you “beautiful” in the local language (or maybe that’s just me ;)). Only time will tell. But until then, just keep doing you.
<3 Bella